Yes, we need a little Christmas now! I have had the blues this year more than most, about the holiday season. I just can't get in the spirit of the Season of Light. I am not sure why, but I know a lot of it has to being older, and alone. No, I don't live alone. Prof and Kiddo are here, but I am still alone.
There are a lot of festivities going on that I used to attend, but it's just not fun to go alone. And, there is another side to that coin, I haven't found anyone that I really want to ask to go along.
There's the bi-annual Madrigal Dinner. I used to perform with the Madrigal Singers. Now, I don't, and I don't attend the dinner anymore either. I don't attend the Christmas party at our church, and I probably won't go to the Choir Christmas party either. This is no one's fault but mine, and I know I'm whining, buy I just don't do alone very well.
I am not in the mood to shop this year. I don't know what to get anyone, and it seems like all my family has everything they want or need, so what fun is "more of the same." I asked for lists, and most of what the family wants is gift cards. What fun is watching them opening a gift card. And, I never see what they bought with the gift card. I hate to give money,too, for the same reason.
So, call me Scrooge! I have a few more days to get with the program. Today, I got outside in the 50 degree weather and put up some outside lights and wreaths. That was fun, and believe it or not, it helped. I have my tree up inside, and partially decorated. Lil Bro said not to overdo the tree in case the two baby grands decided to touch and feel on Christmas. He just did not want any of the old family heirlooms to get broken. So I bought some less expensive (can we say cheap) ornaments this year. It looks fine. There will plenty of years to have up the big tree and the old ornaments.
So, I am trying to think more positive and get more into the spirit. Maybe more snow will help. That is what the weatherman is predicting for next week. We'll see what happens.
Peace, not Bah Humbug,
JE
7 comments:
I'm sorry that you are feeling the holiday blues. I feel much the same way. I'm not working Mon. Want to go to town about an hour south of here? I need to get a couple things from Sam's.
Is there no ladyfriend in your life to "do" things with? Some nice widow you know through church or theater or a single lady you know who might enjoy the company of a gentleman who is also alone? and if that doesn't do it, how about a volunteering gig at a shelter or a convelescent home. Offer to play Santa at a community center or a school or day care or a hospital....especially a children's hospital. If I where there I would go along with you as your very own elf!! A lot of how we feel at any given time is really what we allow ourselves to focus on. Change your focus, change your mood! Christmas is too special a time not to be feeling the spirit of good cheer!!
Hugs from me to you!
Mel
WE could give you a list of actual stuff but you requested we give you ideas on places you can buy gifts cards from because you're not buying any "toys" this year. I don't like giving gift cards either. It won't be much fun exchanging gift cards at Christmas. :)
Hey Booknut, I broke down and bought some toys anyway. The kids are pretty much taken care of, it's you and Lil Bro that I need some ideas for besides gift cards. Any suggestions? Preferably stuff I can get here in town. LOL! And I know, I asked for it, didn't I.
Curley: Thought you'd never ask. What time do you want to leave. Maybe we should get some biscuits and gravy on the way...
Mel: Nope no lady-friend...or at least not one like that. I know a few divorcees, but they are bitter and seem to put a barrier up around me. (And I brush, floss and use deodorant, too.) No, no widow ladies that interest me. I met a couple in my grief-recovery, group, but wow, were they ever pushy. They both have moved on to other guys already! I get what you say about focus. I have sort of lost my focus, and will strive to get it back. Thanks for you kind words.
Best wishes in pulling yourself out of the holiday doldrums - as Red Green says "I'm pullin' for ya; we're in this together."
Sans Peur,
Terry
Speaking from my very little bit of experience, I've learned that I'm the loneliest when I isolate myself. I've lost good friends by repeatedly pushing them away, and never had a bestie for the same reason. Christmas is such a sweet time, not so much for how it is now, but as a reminder of what it once was,the birthday of a King.
When you know that King, when you stop pushing Him away, you'll no longer be lonely.
I really enjoy your blog so I am picking this one where you had the blues to actually comment for a change.
Some holidays are like that. You may feel differently when actual Christmas gets here and if you don't then you don't. Just don't be on your back about it.
A practical tip: I use our "family heriloom" ornaments but the bottom 3 feet of the tree are the cheap ones I don't care about. Another thing that works around here is to have a children's tree that they CAN touch and the other one is off limits. One year I put the "off limits" one in the playpen as a reminder!
Chin up; you are lonely but you are not alone. It will get better!
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